Roseanne Barr wowed both crowds and reviewers with a performance that some called “groundbreaking.” According to many individuals who may or may not work for Fox, her one-night standup act was so successful that they had no option but to bring her on full-time.

“She’s just amazing,” Programming Director Joe Barron said. “We knew right away there was an audience for her.” The agreement was verified by Roseanne’s representative.

The new program will have a smart title to tempt folks who believe calling your kids libtards and telling bizarre stories about dating your own cousin are hilarious, which is basically our target audience.

The inimitable Jon Voight will be Rosie’s first guest, and he will likely spend the majority of his time praising former President Donald Trump, standing solidly with the state of Israel, and praying for the soul of Benjamin Netanyahu. On that one, it’s conceivable he knows something we don’t.

We anticipate some more actual winners on the right to join her panel, but unlike “The View,” they won’t all be women. “I’m not a sexist like Whoopi,” Roseanne said, adding, “I might even hire that cousin I dated.” Let me tell you, he was a real man.”

Patriots, we laughed as hard as you did. She is a perennial national treasure. In the same league as Ben Stein. God bless the United States of America.