In terms of acceptable conduct, the 1980s appear to be an entirely different era. Things that were considered normal or were simply part of everyday television expectations from the 1960s to the 1990s might result in actors being blacklisted now. But there was one game show in the 1980s that featured cringe-worthy moments that, even at the time, could have raised some eyebrows, but everyone appeared to go along with it, except for one brave little girl.
Despite the unpleasant times between the game show presenter and the young ladies, the Canadian show Just Like Mom aired from 1980 to 1985. The daughters, ages 7 to 12, appeared on the show with their mother, answering questions about each other, and competed in bake-offs to discover which couple knew each other the best. Just Like Mom was conceived by Catherine Swing, the wife of the show’s host Fergie Olver, who would frequently stand uncomfortably near to the girls, eliciting kisses.
Recently, a compilation video featuring the game show presenter behaving in a problematic manner has gone viral. In the video, Oliver stands alongside the females, frequently laying his hand on their backs and bringing his face close to theirs to ask questions. The first clip shows 11-year-old Lee Ann, with Oliver hovering over her, asking what color her eyes are.
“What color are your eyes?” Olver inquires before the youngster informs him that they are blue, to which he says, “They are not blue, so don’t tell me that. Look at me more closely.” Just as the girl leans in slightly, afraid to do so, Olver kisses the youngster on the side of her mouth and announces, “They’re green.”
The unusual situation seemed to leave the audience speechless. Some others gasp loudly, some awkwardly laugh, and a few appear to send out a high-pitched shocked shriek. The female also chuckles nervously, as the host remains quite near. Video clip after video clip depicts similar situations in which the presenter attempts to kiss the girls or have them kiss him, but one small girl refuses. While she looked frightened about doing so in front of a live audience, on television, and defying an adult’s instruction, she stayed firm.
This was a moment when parents could observe firsthand the benefits of teaching body autonomy and the power of teaching children that no is a complete phrase. Initially, Olver disregarded the little girl’s “no” and attempted to force her to kiss him, despite her clear discomfort and lack of interest in the request.
The presenter approaches the little girl and says, “You look like a girl who likes to give out hugs and kisses,” to which the girl giggles awkwardly and answers, “Not really.” That didn’t deter him, Olver continued. “Not really? Can I get a hug and a kiss?” This time, the girl gives a clear answer by shaking her head no and repeating “uh-uh,” indicating her anxiety. She’s visibly uncomfortable as she bites her fingernail, attempting to impose control over her body over someone much older.
At this stage, the youngster has communicated clearly. She instantly informed the host that she did not give out hugs and kisses, and when that didn’t work, she had the confidence to say no more explicitly. Oliver was still unable to accept the child’s boundaries and tried to exert pressure by questioning her decision, “I can’t have one?” Again, the youngster shakes her head and says no, but he presses, adding, “Even if I whisper in your ear that Alison, you’re going to win the show?” I still can’t have a hug and a kiss?” Oliver shifts tactics, telling the youngster, “Well, I guess you can’t win the show then if I don’t get a hug and a kiss.”
Alison stood strong in her refusal, but the host’s actions prompted the child’s mother to brand him a disgusting old man. In the end, the presenter appears to have moved on and informed the girl she did a nice job answering one of the questions, but to top it off, Oliver attempts to steal a kiss. The tiny girl didn’t let it prevent her from promptly avoiding his advances.
Alison’s parents appear to have instilled in her the concept of physical autonomy, giving her complete authority to say no to adults and anyone else who enters her space without her agreement. While the experience was definitely not one she would have liked to have, that moment likely provided other young girls watching the opportunity to tell the host and others like him no. And “no” is a whole phrase, especially when it comes to someone’s body. There is no more explanation required. There is no more clarity. The answer is a simple no. Well done, Alison. Well done.